the honeymoon is over

Teaching turned out to be a more difficult task than I thought. Sure, I taught in the DR for two years, and believe me, that was no walk in the park. It is a whole other thing when there are actual criteria that have to be met. I am responsible for the entire education of my fourth grade class.

The lesson plans, the planning, the grading, the kiddos- it's exhausting!

-especially when the students are similar to my little Haitian and Dominican friends.

I have had a couple students that have already served In School Suspension and one that was suspended for hitting last Friday.

Last Wednesday was the first day that I really left work feeling defeated. Everyone has those kind of days. The days where as soon as you drive away from the school or office building or whatever, tears start streaming down your face and you hope the cars around you don't notice.

This particular day I was frustrated. Frustrated with my students' back talk and attitude. The first week and a half were absolutely perfect, and I pridefully thought that I was a natural. My class was controlled, they were learning, listening, it was fun.

After eight days, the honeymoon was over and the kids began to test.

Since then, it has been rough. 8 days of bliss then 12 of struggle.

So there I was, crying throughout the entire drive home. Not being able to keep up to speed with everything it takes to do this job well. Not able to find my phone that is normally on my desk or in my pocket, concerned that it had been taken by one of my students. The next day was Open House. Lots of different emotions during that drive.

I am doing better now. Open House went well, I found my phone, Thursday and Friday were better days. I just completely underestimated the degree of intensity that first year teachers face.

I'll let you know how this coming week unfolds.